I took Liam to the mall today. My husband wanted space so he could clean the house. True story. But that’s not the story.
Today I learned just how crafty my little almost-11-month-old is. I took him inside one of the double-sized changing rooms with an ambitious amount of clothing to try on. He started out seated in his stroller with some toys and facing “the baby in the mirror” (a.k.a. himself). This entertained him all of 1.5 minutes before tossing his toys out of the stroller and growling. Then the blankets were thrown on the floor with avengance and the growling turned to screaming. I had barely gotten out of my jeans and into the pair I was trying on.
I took him out of the stroller and held his hands while he walked out of the changing room and gleefully “ran” (holding my hands) toward the 3-way mirror. But of course we had to get back into our room so that I could try the rest of the clothes on, which meant I had to tear Liam away from the wall of mirrors.
Over the course of about 45 minutes and while in various states of un-dress I accomplished the following: saved Liam from the all-dangerous hangers which I had callously thrown upon the floor, nursed him, slammed the door shut after he somehow managed to jiggle the door open, tried on 3 shirts, nursed him, “walked” the runway to the 3-way mirror 5 times, tried on 2 pairs of pants and finally, ran out of the changing room half-naked after he figured out how to crawl under the door.
Sneaky bastard. Had to turn a contained area into an infinitely-larger arena by figuring out the old crawl-under-the-door trick.
Does anyone else remember crawling under the changing room walls while waiting for their mom? I definitely chased my brothers on hands and knees occasionally startling the unfortunate store patron changing amongst our maze. After Liam took off under the door today I recalled this frequent memory of my childhood and thought, Jeez, did my mom let us crawl under walls? Did she try to stop us? Then I remember, No, my mom had 4 kids. She was probably glad we were occupied for 2 minutes while she threw on a pair of pants. If I had 4 kids…hell, if I had 2 kids…I’d probably let them crawl around so that I could get through that process faster than I did today.
Tonight I will dream about those days when I leisurely visited any and all stores I wanted to and would thoughtfully consider all possibilities of an ensemble. And, in case you’re wondering how many of those items I ended up purchasing today…
none, of course.